Tuesday, September 20, 2011

EVERY PARTY NEEDS A POOPER...THAT'S WHY WE INVITED YOU

I am more than disenchanted with the tea party. Not sure if I should capitalize "tea party", but at this juncture, we're lazy, so no caps. I am the person that dislikes, no hates, being controlled. I don't like being told what to do, what to think, how to look, what light bulb to use, how much fat intake I should eat, what car I should drive or what opinions to adopt in order to remain a "true" conservative. Let's get this one thing straight, I am all about my agency and when someone tries to trample on that in any way, shape or form, I rebel. I kick, I scream, I throw tantrums and turn into a monster that no one knows how to quiet down. Mary J. Blige said take me as I am, or have nothing at all. That's how I feel. Not just in life, but in politics. So in the spirit of self-indulgence and self-determination, let me educate you, once again about the tea party and why I see them NO differently than this, the Obama administration. Yes, that's what I said. So gulp it down with no sugar bitches, you are about to get run. Straight from the www.teaparty.org website are the following statements. Make sure to understand what it is you are supporting before you show allegiance to anything. From the site:
NON-NEGOTIABLE CORE BELIEFS OF THE TEA PARTY  
1. Illegal Aliens Are Here Illegally. My commentary: No shit. As someone who lives in a border state and has used "illegal aliens" regularly, I am not going to hypocritically marry this philosophy. Besides, thanks for stating the obvious and unfortunately the original tea party kinda was here illegally, too. Just sayin.
2. Pro-Domestic Employment Is Indispensable. My commentary: Meaning?? I got nothin.
3. Stronger Military Is Essential. My commentary: I agree with this statement wholeheartedly. But let's get this one thing straight, I am not an isolationist.  
4.Special Interests Eliminated. My commentary: Isn't the tea party itself a "special interest" group? I'm confused. Not only that, but in a democracy I think freedom of speech and expression are essential and belonging to a group that has a very special interest in how the government taxes it's people should be free to exist. Don't contradict yourself party of tea.
5. Gun Ownership Is Sacred. My commentary: No it isn't. Don't say stupid shit. When something is sacred it denotes a divine purpose and gun ownership while constitutional and a right, is certainly not sacred. I'm pretty sure that even though we all are entitled to shoot ourselves and others with a machine gun, the government has tanks, fighter jets, bombs....the nuclear kind and they would pretty much kick your handgun's ass. Just sayin. Keep it real tea party.
6. Government Must Be Downsized. My commentary: straight up, I'll give you that one. But let's not go overboard with asinine anarchy speech. Education and some taxation are essential. While you like to pee on the Bush administration for his "growing the government" let's not forget that the war on terror is real, on-going and that means it never ends. Let's be realistic about our goals and maintain a balanced approach to what this means. Extreme positions that infer a complete governmental retreat is stupid.  
7. National Budget Must Be Balanced. My commentary: OK, maybe. Not sure why, but I will concede that a severe audit of waste should be done, but from where I sit that just means that the mafia will do it's own audit. Again, blanket statements of absolutes don't work in this gray area ridden mind. Explain further.  
8. Deficit Spending Will End. My commentary: I'm no rocket economist, but logic would dictate that some deficit spending in times of recession is necessary. Now shut-up about excessive spending, no dah. Of course it should be minimal and disciplined. Obama took it to a ridiculous level, let's agree on that. But it needs to be an option....  
9. Bail-Out And Stimulus Plans Are Illegal. My commentary: Unless those bail-outs directly benefit American citizens. I agree, no stimulus plan has ever stimulated and gross bail-outs to corporations don't work. But bail me out. All. Day. Long. I think we may be in agreement here.  
10. Reduce Personal Income Taxes A Must. My commentary: Yes it is.  
11. Reduce Business Income Taxes Are Mandatory. My commentary: Totally!!
12. Political Offices Available To Average Citizens. My commentary: For real! bitches!!  
13. Intrusive Government Stopped. My commentary: YES! YES! YES!!  
14. English As Core Language Is Required. My commentary: I mean, snore. Do I care?? No  
15. Traditional Family Values Are Encouraged. My commentary: No. Family Values are a Must. Don't go guns are sacred, less government and downplay the most important issue of all. Get some backbone tea party. Stand for something greater than lowering my taxes. YO!
There you have it folks. Keep it real and keep it logical. I'm not a tea party member, whatever that means. I do belong to the Nikki party of cool, independent politics. And sucka don't play me. If I choose to wear pink lipstick with green eyeshadow that's my choice. You don't like my view on gay marriage, gun control or my voluptuous figure, shove it. I may be merging two worlds, but I feel the Republican party slipping into ridiculous, vitriolic territory. I'm going independent if that happens. My individuality is much more important to me than conformity. My own life is filled with those who accept me as I am and I will not be party to a party who throws non-negotiable ideals at me. So is it with the people around me. I'm me and you can kiss this...or not. Either way I will always be in love with me, the most.  I AM OUT.

6 comments:

namaste said...

WARNING: do not read this post while drinking coffee. choking and coughing may occur when laughing.

nik, you are my morning ray of sunshine with this no-holds-barred, funny as hell post. no, dah!

i'm not anti-tea party. while i'm not outspoken in support, i've always agreed with with their right to convene. but you have certainly given me an education on them today. and as usual you kept it interesting!

"don't say stupid shit!" great post, nik!!

The Vineyard said...

So I checked out FreedomWorks for 10 minutes, months ago and never "connected" with anyone. Mr. Kibbe has worked in politics long enough to know how to galvanize a movement and promote his platform. That is not to say I even disagree with Kibbe on most things. And that is not to say his organization doesn't do a good job of providing contact info for our reps.

But Kibbe is trying to tell FreedomWorks folks how to vote. He puts up the summary of a bill and then tells you what to tell your congressman.

But most telling was his time on O'Reilly re: FreedomWorks protest of Romney. Because of Romneycare, er, well cuz Mitt ignored me. It's classic having O'Reilly grill Kibbe and you come away feeling like this protest was indeed more personal than political.

With that said, I attended the very first Tea Party meeting in my hometown. A bunch of seniors and a bunch of WWII or Korean vets speaking. Dry, unrehearsed and maybe one politician invited. But everyone there was just like me. Citizens. Not real organized and quite casual. That aspect of the tea party movement is still embodied by most of us, including yourself as you blog from the heart.

But as we all know, politicians will co-opt anything we blindly let them. If you belong to a tea party and you are nominating leaders, and approving platforms, time to get out and register Republican.

Nikki said...

Great comment Vineyard! I had to pull over in the car just to get the full gist. It's amazing how really both parties sport their big babies, but still we must go with the one closest to our core values. I agree, register republican and let's get this thing done. Thanks again...:)N

Nikki said...

Namaste, we could never laugh enough...you and I. Let's just get that straight right now!! Hugs...:)N

Kold_Kadavr_flatliner, sub/dude said...

Owwch, girly. Gotta whole lotta angst. While that's terrific, who's it directed against? The masses? If it is, why? Shouldn't it be leveled at the institution of the Blakk Domicile where stupid, stanky BO lives for allowing himself to be controlled like a puppet/pawn by the billionaires from above? Join me Upstairs, miss gorgeous girl, and lower your voice. God can definitely hear you. See ya soon. Puh-leeze lemme kiss thy feets. God bless you.

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